Have you ever watched one of those shows on HGTV, one where the team of experts comes in to remake and remodel some regular person’s home? There are a million of these, but the one I saw most recently was an episode of “Property Brothers.”
Jonathan and Drew, the aforementioned brothers, were helping a family who wanted to sell their suburban house and move into the city. In order to sell the house, the brothers said they needed to update it first because the colors, style, and furniture were dated and unappealing. When the brothers were done, the family’s house did look different than it had—now it looked like every other house that has ever been on one of these shows, sleek, with throw pillows.
This gets to the heart of something I grapple with in our coaching work. We help people to develop their authentic voice and style. These TV shows make it seem like there are two options—the tacky bad old way and the shiny new good way. Where is the option that allows the family to live in a house that reflects their own style and taste?
Similarly, our coaching clients often receive feedback that says, in essence, “Your way won’t do. Do it like this.” “This” usually means, “in a way that is familiar and comfortable to me.” It’s the speaking-style equivalent to new light fixtures and carefully arranged throw pillows.
What I’m interested in is what’s real. We coach our clients to communicate in a way that shows them at their best, that resonates with who they are, and that reaches their audience. To do this without resorting to tips and tricks that only give the impression of realness.
Don’t settle for throw pillows.
