What would I like about this, if I liked it?

Angie Flynn-McIver

Angie Flynn-McIver

For several years, I sent out a blog to readers a few times a week. These posts gave pointers about how to practice, shared relevant stories, and provided a way for people to connect with my coaching approach. In 2022, I wrote my book, Before You Say Anything, which brought many of these ideas together in one place. The blog posts have continued to resonate with clients and readers, and they're useful as a quick reminder, so I'm including them here!

In a recent New Yorker article, the art critic Peter Schjeldahl shared his formula for grappling with a work of art that he found not to his taste. He asks, “What would I like about this, if I liked it?”

 

How refreshing! Sometimes it fees like the world is full of people walking around looking for something to dislike, to criticize, to bring down.

 

What would it feel like to employ this idea instead? To let go of our own reflexive opinions and look for something else? To experiment with seeing a work of art through the eyes of a fan? What might we gain from assuming an attitude of curiosity rather than critique?

 

I’m not suggesting we shouldn’t be critical thinkers, or that we have to like everything. Far from it. But it’s worth noticing when we reflexively look for the negative, rather than looking for what we might like, if we liked it.

 

Want to get some practice in suspending critical thinking? Read more here!