The Blog / Archive

This seems obvious. When someone gives you bad advice, just…don’t do it. Ignore it. The problem comes when you can’t identify the advice as being bad. You’re not an expert in the topic, and whatever you’ve been told seems reasonable.  How can we protect ourselves from the bad advice when we can’t tell it’s bad? In most areas, I’m not going to be much help in helping you differentiate. The times when I’ve taken bad advice (and lived to regret it) are many and various. But when we’re talking about public speaking and presentation skills, let me share this. If … Read more

Sometimes you’re in rehearsal, and everything just clicks. The jokes land, the heartstrings are tugged, people are inspired, and you reach a new height of achievement. That rehearsal makes you feel like a freakin’ genius! Here’s the pitfall of that experience, though. It feels so good that you (understandably) want to chase that feeling, so you try to replicate exactly what you did and said. When that happens, you’re going into a part of your brain that is remembering and copying, rather than creating in the moment. The result is a pale and preoccupied imitation that always disappoints. Instead of … Read more

I started going to a new gym recently, and the coach I was working with yesterday did something I’ve never seen before (but that I am absolutely going to steal for my own coaching.) We were working on a technical part of a weightlifting movement, one that I really struggle with. He said: “Okay, when we’re talking and thinking about the lift, I want you to stand over here, off the lifting platform. When it’s time to do it, step back on the platform.”  This is genius. There is a time for abstract thinking, for talking, for figuring it out, … Read more

A dress rehearsal marks the final opportunity for actors to rehearse a play before an audience arrives. It runs exactly like a performance: all the costumes (the “dress” part of the phrase), lights, props, sound, set and other production elements are present. No one stops or calls for a line. It starts when the curtain would go up on a show night, and everyone, including front of house, stage management, cast, and crew, treats the evening like they would a performance in front of an audience. The function of this rehearsal is clear: do all the things just like you … Read more

Many good public speakers speak so often that it can seem redundant to practice. If you’re addressing groups large and small a couple times a week, doesn’t that become its own practice? Not really. The value of true practice—working through a piece methodically, being videoed, getting knowledgable feedback, trying sections over and over until the speaker inhabits the material—can’t be replaced. After all, when we are speaking to the audience, there are no do-overs, there’s little reflection, and there’s typically no constructive feedback. And what do we hear afterwards? The speech was good! Or at least good enough.  Understandably, most … Read more

The manager doesn’t get her job performance review from the barista in the lobby.  The department head wouldn’t ask his next-door neighbor to go over his projections for the fiscal year. The coach isn’t looking into the stands for insight to fix his team’s struggles. The manager, the department head, and the coach turn to those who understand the field, the context, and the complex variables to give them necessary feedback. The barista, the neighbor, and the fans are all knowledgable about something—just not about all that matters to these people in these circumstances. If you’re going to give a … Read more

“If you do it in practice, you’ll do it in a game.” I don’t know who said this originally, but it’s a piece of sports wisdom that jumps right off the page at me. When I came across it recently, the person saying it meant that if you do it right in practice, you’ll do it right in the game. But the opposite is true, too. (And of course, I’m now not thinking about sports but about communication.) If you phone it in when you practice, you won’t be dynamic when it’s time to do it for real. If you … Read more

Sometimes clients are referred to us for communication coaching, and we can’t…quite tell why. They’re smart and clear, and they don’t struggle to convey their meaning, at least when they’re talking to us. When we dig a little bit, an interesting situation reveals itself. The people who referred the client to us don’t like what the client is saying. It’s not that they’re saying it badly, or wrong. There’s just some element of the message that isn’t welcome to the rest of the organization. I’ll give you an example. A few years ago the Chief Financial Officer of a marketing … Read more

“If you do it in practice, you’ll do it in a game.” I don’t know who said this originally, but it’s a piece of sports wisdom that jumps right off the page at me. When I came across it recently, the person saying it meant that if you do it right in practice, you’ll do it right in the game. But the opposite is true, too. (And of course, I’m now not thinking about football but about communication.) If you phone it in when you practice, you won’t be dynamic when it’s time to do it for real. If you … Read more